AUBURN – The family of Madison Dillingham gathered at her Sabattus home Wednesday night but it was to plan her funeral, not to celebrate the holiday.

“It’s going to be tough. It’s going to be a hard holiday,” said Seth Roberts, Madison’s father. “We usually have so much to be thankful for. Now we just miss her so much.”

Dillingham, 18, and in her first year of college, died late Tuesday after a head-on car crash in Minot. She was an honors student, a member of the Civil Air Patrol and a gifted athlete. She was also, according to her driver’s license, an organ donor.

The teen, who has no history of accidents or motor vehicle violations, was pronounced dead at a Lewiston hospital shortly before midnight after the 1998 Ford Contour she was driving collided with another car on Jackson Hill Road at 6:15 p.m.

“Madison was the perfect balance of tenacity, passion, fun, beauty and sprit,” said 17-year-old Katherine Knight of Raymond, a close friend of the teenager. “She was loved by all in the Civil Air Patrol as a cadet, a leader and a best friend. She was a teacher, a commander, a mentor, an example of everything right in life. I missed her so much when she went off to college, now we all just have to miss her a little bit longer.”

Minot woman in hospital

In Lewiston, a different family was also coping with crisis rather than happily anticipating Thanksgiving Day.

Kathy Pratte, 45, of Harris Road in Minot lay in a hospital bed with her family around her. Pratte, who was driving a 1999 Chevrolet Malibu that was struck by Madison’s vehicle, was at Central Maine Medical Center. She was listed in fair condition.

Police said both her upper legs were broken. She also broke her heel. Her passenger, daughter Brianna Pratte, 19, suffered minor leg injuries and was treated and released, police said.

At the hospital Wednesday, Pratte was with her husband, Mike, and the couple’s three daughters. She was too tired from surgery to speak about her ordeal, according to a hospital representative. Her recovery was expected to be a long one.

Police, meanwhile, were still trying to sort out details of the crash. It appeared Madison was rounding a corner and descending a hill when her vehicle crossed the center line and collided with Pratte’s car, said Androscoggin County Sheriff’s Sgt. James Jacques. Speed may be a factor, he said in a written release. Maine State Police are reconstructing the accident.

The drivers and passenger had to be cut out of the cars by rescue crews. All three had been wearing seat belts. Both driver-side airbags deployed, Jacques said.

While Pratte’s family waited and hoped for a full recovery, the family of Madison Dillingham reflected on an ambitious young life cut short.

Madison graduated in the top 10 percent of her class at Oak Hill High School in Wales, where she was enrolled her senior year. Before that, she was at Windham High School, where she earned the Billy Mitchell Award, the Amelia Earhart Award and the Scholar-Athlete Award.

“Madison was very determined. She set a path for herself and that’s what she was on,” said Roberts, her father. “She was a teenager, but you could always count on her.”

At Oak Hill High School, she excelled in academics as well as athletics, said Principal Patricia Doyle. She was also a member of the Auxiliary U.S. Air Force, the National Spanish Honor Society and Maine’s highest ranked member of the Civil Air Patrol.

“She was always there,” said Joey Washuk, who served with Madison at the Cumberland County Civil Air Patrol. “She really strived to be as good as any of the guys, if not better. She was a very nice girl, very positive.”

Washuk on Wednesday night also had a great deal of sympathy for Madison’s family. He knows her parents, Seth and Tia Roberts, and recalled how proud they were of the teenager. Whenever Madison had a school or other activity, one or both parents attended.

“It’s an extremely close family,” Washuk said. “They were very supportive of her.”

Others who knew Madison’s commitment to academics and to her future made similar comments. Scott Higgins, her commander at the CAP, said Madison joined the group when she was 12 years old and excelled over the years.

“She came in a shy, timid little girl and left a lady,” he said. “She was a very caring person. She was on her way to a great career, a great life.”

“She was an active student, gifted, and it’s a tragedy,” said Principal Doyle. “She had a very bright future ahead of her.”

Dillingham had started her first year at the University of Maine at Farmington, where she was studying English. At Oak Hill, she had enrolled in mostly honors courses and even took a freshman German class at Bates College.

She also was a gifted athlete, Doyle said. At Oak Hill High School, Dillingham played second base for the girls’ softball team, which played in the semifinals last year.

As her father pointed out, Madison was also a teenager. And sometimes, when she wasn’t striving to be the best athlete, student and friend, she was acting the way teenagers do.

“Most of the things we did were childish, in the best sense of the word. We watched Disney movies together and sang ‘Hakuna Matata’ at the top of our lungs in the car, stormed the local Wal-Mart on Friday nights, sat on Santa’s lap at the mall,” said Knight. “Madison was exciting, energetic, and never afraid to let her spirit shine through. She embraced the child in her, and reminded others to let loose every once in a while.”

On the popular Web site wwww.myspace.com, where Dillingham maintained a Web page, her friends were posting messages throughout the day and night to express their horror and grief. In a sign of teenage familiarity, most of them referred to their lost friend by the abbreviated version of her name: Madi.

“Madi, I’m gonna miss you so much,” wrote one MySpace user named Ashton. “We had too much fun together. God bless.”

“Madi. I cant believe your gone. I miss you so much already,” wrote another. “I love you so much and i wish we could have hung out one last time.”

An early entry on the Web page was signed by Tia, her mother: “Madison… I love you and miss you. But I know that you are in a wonderful world w/our savior and lord. You are a beautiful angel! And I know that you are looking down on us, protecting us and your sisters!”

Madison’s father said Wednesday night that family members had planned to get together for the holiday before learning of the crash. It will be good to have everybody together, he said. But, of course, they’ll wish that Madison was among them.

“I know people say this kind of thing about their friends or relatives all the time,” said Roberts, her father. “But she was so loyal and compassionate. She was a great human being. I was very proud of her.”