DEAR ABBY: My daughter recently had a baby boy. Mother and baby are doing fine, but the problem is the sonogram during pregnancy showed a baby girl, according to the doctor.

So now our grandson has a slew of pink blankets, jammies and clothes given by friends before little Jack was born. I say, no big deal.

My wife says it is a big deal. No way a boy should be dressed in pink.

She’s worried the color will give the wrong message to people, who will then treat our grandson like a girl in a way they won’t even be aware of, even though they’re told he’s a boy.

She worries that this will somehow make him a cross-dresser when he’s grown up and make him gay. Our daughter and son-in-law are in a quandary, too, over the pink clothes. What do you think? – JACK’S GRANDPA IN GUERNEVILLE, CALIF.

As long as the baby gifts have not been used, there should be no problem exchanging them for items in the “right” color.

However, please tell your wife that her fears are groundless. Even if her grandson decides to become a cross-dresser later in life – which, by the way is NOT related to what color clothes a man wore as a baby – it won’t make him gay. The majority of cross-dressers are heterosexual.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 23-year-old “woman.” I say “woman” because I still feel like a girl.

I graduated from college two years ago. Unlike a lot of people my age, I am self-supporting.

Since graduation, I have tried to adopt some of the behaviors of an adult. I work hard at my job and manage my money well.

I get up early on weekends and do chores around the house, and I’m learning how to cook. I make an effort to reach out to my parents, who are recently retired. I try to learn about the world around me and keep up with the news. So why do I still feel like a teenage kid? – KID AT HEART IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR KID AT HEART: Please don’t judge yourself so harshly. You are more mature than many people who are chronologically older.

From my perspective, it appears that you are growing up at a very respectable pace. If you are under the impression that because people reach a certain age they are suddenly mature adults, you are operating under a misconception.

Age is only a number. People mature at different rates, and there are folks in their 50s, 60s and older who are still growing up. Wisdom and maturity are gained cumulatively – and in some cases it can take a lot longer than 21 years for individuals to stop behaving like children.

DEAR ABBY: I was visiting a local shopping center and was dismayed to notice that the car parked next to mine had a baby seat in the back – complete with an actual live baby.

My first instinct was to immediately call the police. However, it was a mild day and partially overcast, and the moderate conditions made me hesitate for fear of being a “busybody.” A day later, I’m still second-guessing myself.

So I ask you, did I do the right thing by not sticking my nose in, or was it my responsibility to have alerted the authorities? – INDECISIVE IN SAN MATEO

Unless you were prepared to stay by the vehicle until that foolish, neglectful parent returned, you should have called the police.

Leaving a baby alone in a parking lot, regardless of how mild the weather was, is against the law. In some states, there are also laws against leaving pets in parked cars.

TO MY JEWISH READERS: Sundown marks the first night of Passover. Happy Passover, everyone!

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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