Substitute, me for him

If Jeff Gordon is forced to miss a race to attend the birth of his daughter, Mark Martin will take his place in the No. 24 Chevrolet. In related news, Mrs. Gordon’s physician will be replaced at the child’s delivery by Dr. Jerry Punch.

Sorry don’t feed the Giambino

Jason Giambi reportedly failed an amphetamines test within the last year. Jason, just set aside a couple of hours tomorrow to apologize for all the drugs you’ve done and get it over with. And apologize to A’s and Red Sox fans for your brother Jeremy while you’re at it.

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