So when did, um, Bowl Subdivision football turn into the NFL, anyway?

It’s hard enough to swallow that the Atlanta Falcons and Buffalo Bills are capable of beating anybody at home. But Division I-A used to be the beacon and bastion of reliability.

Then seven of the Associated Press’ top 13 teams (disclaimer: I, for one, didn’t have Rutgers anywhere near my upper echelon, thank you very much) lost on the final Saturday of September.

No. 1 LSU and No. 2 USC barely led at halftime against theoretically much lesser competition. If you think either one of them is a lock to go 12-0 or 13-0, you smoked your breakfast.

My Saturday winning percentage has dipped to Whitehouse proportions. It’s disturbing. But having a month of knowledge and common opponent scores under my belt ought to start paying dividends this week. Right? Can I get an amen?

Florida at LSU – The rule when you’re handicapping pro games is to go with the desperate team. Here in scholar-athlete land, that would be the Gators after last week’s debacle against Auburn. Already, the geniuses who host and patronize radio call-in programs are roasting Urban Meyer, wondering aloud whether or not if the spread option will work in the SEC. Not sure if they were watching last year, but he won a National Freaking Championship. Upset special #1 Florida, 24-21.

Oklahoma at Texas – Battle of two lousy big-game coaches whose programs inexplicably won national titles in spite of them. Bob Stoops should squirm away to the pros at the next available offer before his myth is completely repudiated. Right now, though, he has better material to work with than Mack Brown. Oklahoma, 31-10.

Kentucky at South Carolina – What’s all this garbage about the Wildcats being a top-five team? Let’s take inventory of who they’ve beaten, OK? Eastern Kentucky, Kent State, Louisville, Arkansas, Florida Atlantic. The fraud stops here. South Carolina, 27-20.

Ohio State at Purdue – Buckeyes might be better this season without all that star power. Purdue hasn’t known star power — or this kind of start to a season — since Drew Brees. Edge to the team that’s actually played somebody. Ohio State, 21-16.

Virginia Tech at Clemson – Subtract their lopsided loss at LSU and the Hokies have home wins over East Carolina, Ohio, William & Mary and North Carolina on their ledger. Nothing to write Michael Vick in jail about. Clemson, 17-12.

Wisconsin at Illinois – Doesn’t matter if the Badgers play The Citadel or The Patriots; they win by three. Wisconsin, 13-10.

Georgia at Tennessee – Volunteers are 10-28 against the spread in their last 38 home games. And if they’re anything more than a pick ’em favorite in this game, it’s excessive respect based on the name across their chest. Georgia, 20-19.

Cincinnati at Rutgers – Please, Rutgers, do your part so we won’t have to listen to the ridiculous assertion that an unbeaten Big East team belongs in the national title game. Rutgers, 26-24.

Kansas at Kansas State – Like anyone expected this game to matter. K-State’s only loss was at Auburn, which doesn’t look so bad now that the Tigers beat Florida. Kansas State, 38-27.

Nebraska at Missouri – The team from the Show Me State has to show me they can beat somebody tougher than Illinois State or Western Michigan. Upset special #2 Nebraska, 30-27.

West Virginia at Syracuse – Not sure where that win over Louisville came from two weeks ago, but the follow-up against Miami (Ohio) proved the Orange are still horrible. West Virginia, 49-17.

Bowling Green at Boston College – The brutal schedule continues. BC, 28-7.

Arizona State at Washington State – I’m convinced Dennis Erickson could turn Rice or Vanderbilt into a winner in one season. Arizona State, 35-17.

Notre Dame at UCLA – Irish fans are clinically insane if they think this team could even beat Navy, Air Force, Duke or Stanford right now. 0-12 is within reach. UCLA, 38-10.

Last week: 6-8 (.429). Season: 50-23 (.685). Upset specials: 4-5 (.444)

Who Beat Kalle? Jim Lamontagne, Lewiston (8-6).