T.J.Maxx needs to gloat more. James Bond, apparently, loves chicken fingers. And you, my friend, need a costume.

It’s a retail mash-up!

To Go. Mr. To Go.

So Bag Lady has had these assorted dining/shopping-related tidbits rattling around in her brain for months, and when said number of tidbits reached three, she knew it was time to share. Think of them as “Didya knows.”

* A Cumberland Farms clerk told me some months ago that the large coffee cups are the same size as the medium coffee cups. Large is slim and tall and medium, more short and squat. It sounds believable. And weird. Regardless, they’re both 99 cents. So maybe it’s just psychological?

Attention dieters: That medium cappuccino? Apparently not saving you calories over the large.

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* After spying “007” written on a takeout slip at Chopsticks Restaurant in Lewiston, the clerk said 007 was shorthand for chicken fingers because James Bond loves chicken fingers.

Which, um, I must have missed amid the shooting, jumping out of windows and sleeping with femme fatales. But nonetheless, I love that! And I will forever remember it.

And now it’s seared in your brain, too. You’re welcome.

* My third and most recent clerk offering: BJ’s Wholesale coupons are accepted for a week after they expire. I tested it out. It’s true. And awesome. 

There’s my three. What random retail tidbit can YOU share with us?

Compare at . . . 

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T.J.Maxx was sued this summer over allegations that it inflates the “compare at” price on its price tags to make the bargain seem even more phenomenal.

Bag Lady has a gripe about the exact opposite issue.

Last week, I bought a lovely shirt there for $24.99. “Compare at $45,” said the tag. Except the original retail tag was still also attached with the original, actual prior price: $68.

The same thing has happened many times before. T.J., you’re missing out on a chance to extra impress. C’mon, beat me over the head with those savings!

Oh, no

Mr. Bag Lady and I are cleaning out the basement next week, and you know what that means.

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A half-dozen squabbles. Hand-wringing over what to toss. Me saying at least once: “There’s no way you’re ever going to wear/use/imbibe/display that again.”

Although, that all might happen, too. Great odds, even.

More importantly, it means snakes. Or the threat of snakes around every bag of bottles we should have returned by now and every lamp we should have tossed out in 2003.

Nerves are steeled. Wish me luck.

Halloween public service announcement

Halloween falls on a Saturday this year for the first time since 2009. 

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And you remember how cool 2009 was. (Way.)

So no pressure, but the pressure is ON to attend a Fabulous Adult Holiday Party. Of course, first you can head out with the kids around the neighborhood, then park them safely at Grandma and Grandpa’s, where everyone can sit in the dark, avoiding the knocks on the door, eating bite-sized Snickers until they burst. Good times, and not to be missed — but there’s still the rest of a whole delicious evening afoot.

What to wear to your FAHP? Because you have to wear something. Otherwise, you’re going de facto as Mr./Ms. No Fun.

Mr./Ms. No Fun doesn’t get the laughs, doesn’t get invited to play Twister and doesn’t get a comfortable chair that’s not next to the speaker. Mr./Ms. No Fun gets a handful of Whoppers and the dregs of the sherbet punch bowl.

Don’t be Mr./Ms. No Fun.

You’ve got just over three weeks! I’ll see you in the costume aisle. Should you go as James Bond, I know a fabulous place to get chicken fingers.

Bag Lady’s true identity is protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who have only once acquiesced to a costume. It was Superman. And they rocked it.) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach her at [email protected]


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