Actor Jason Sudeikis in a scene from Season 2 of “Ted Lasso” on Apple TV+. Courtesy Apple TV+

Bag Lady hears parade and she thinks comfy footwear.

Also, clowns, little cars, waiving kids, marching bands and hard candy tossed with abandon. This week, she’s also thinking about fictional soccer, taco salad dip and cat costumes for most excellent reasons.

Let’s do this! Left foot first, on three …

Is “iodine violet” the new blue dress?

Super Shoes in the Auburn Mall is having a 20% off sale on New Balance sneakers (Maine-made! Go us!) where you’ll find such cute, parade-ready walkers as the women’s 410v6 trail runner in, to quote, “iodine violet/aqua green,” which looks completely gray and seafoam to me? Like, not a whiff of violet anywhere?

Have a look and tell Bag Lady what you see.

The forecast early in the week was calling for clouds on Saturday during the State of Maine Bicentennial Parade, but don’t skimp on the sunscreen tomorrow! Or the hand sanitizer — you don’t know where those clowns have been.

Kidding! Clowns don’t come at me.

A few Julie postscripts

Bag Lady was entirely remiss last month in skipping a Julie Awards honoree that I’d meant to include, so if you’ll forgive the delay:

The Julie Award for Best Snack That Sort of Feels Healthy: Mr. Bag Lady’s four-ingredient taco salad dip recipe.

It’s amazing and SO simple. Step one: Smother Philadelphia whipped cream cheese (12 oz., Shaw’s, $4.99) on an oversized plate or medium platter. Cover that in Sisters Salsa (14 oz., Hannaford, $5.99, made in Blue Hill!), straining the salsa first. Top that in Fresh Express shredded lettuce (8 oz., Hannaford, $1.99.) Final step: Cover in shredded cheese. (We like a very mild kick, like Great Value’s fiesta blend, 8 oz., Walmart, $2.42.)

Grab your stiffest tortilla chip of choice and dig in! It’s the perfect summer day snack to pick away at. Mr. Bag Lady likes to sprinkle sliced black olives on his side. I think black olives are dis-gust-ing.

Not kidding. But still — black olive lobby, don’t come at me.

And what about The Julie Award for Best Things to Look Forward to?

A few updates already there! One of those things was “The Suicide Squad” on HBO and I’m not going to lie — it was a lot. Fun and witty, but also legitimately disturbing with nonstop flinging, flying carnage and, like, eight “Rambo”s’ worth of blood. Probably. I’d never actually watch a “Rambo.” I mean, gross. (Rambo peeps — don’t come at me. ) So there was that. Three out of four stars.

Earning four out of four stars, however: Pics that emerged last week of actor David Dastmalchian, who plays Polka Dot Man in the movie, with the stray cat he adopted on set in Panama dressed in an amazing, tiny Polka Dot Man cat costume. She’s ADORABLE. And she’s not clawing off his face. That’s gratitude.

Bag Cat says not to get any ideas. I can already rarely pet her for 25 contiguous seconds without her trying to draw blood. So there’s that, too.

Also, four of out four: Apple TV+’s “Ted Lasso” Season 2. I’m rationing new episodes like they’re the last Kit Kats on earth and quite seriously eyeing an official Ted Lasso A.F.C. Richmond crest adult fleece hooded sweatshirt (WBshop.com, $41.95.) Winter is what, six weeks away? It’s almost time to break out the sweatshirts and cozy up.

“Ted Lasso” fans, come at me! Let’s revel together in all that’s good and mustachioed.

Bag Lady’s true identity is protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who love to be standing under someone shoveling taco salad dip into their mouths) and the customer service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach her at [email protected]

Related Headlines


Only subscribers are eligible to post comments. Please subscribe or to participate in the conversation. Here’s why.

Use the form below to reset your password. When you've submitted your account email, we will send an email with a reset code.

filed under: