The kid with the baseball cap was sitting just a few rows ahead of me, but that didn’t matter. I could have spotted his game a mile away. The way he leaned in close every time he offered the girl his popcorn. The way he laughed whenever she did and of course, the classic yawn-and-stretch […]
Mark LaFlamme
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Shaking off the news gets harder after each tragedy
A couple of weeks ago there was a fatal car wreck in a nearby town. As a news story, it was pretty standard stuff. Time, location, number of cars involved. Get the identities of both drivers, throw in whatever police narrative is available and you’re done. Someone will follow up with the conditions of survivors […]
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Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: A vague mass of unhappy plankton
The other night I was downtown where a group of about 60 kids were said to be attacking people “Children of the Corn” style near the corner of Birch and Knox. It was crazy, yo. According to the notes I scribbled at the scene, “a gargantuan toothache was roiling in the east while unhappy plankton […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Hit me with your best shot, yo
Boy. If I had a nickel for every person who has asked for my thoughts on the Pat Benatar concert last week, you know what I’d have? I wouldn’t have a nickel, that’s for sure. Nobody gives a hang about my penetrating thoughts on Benatar, but I’m going to tell you anyway, and do you […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme, sj-web
Talk of the town: The Lurid Fantasy Gazette
Yodels! The woman who describes herself as “the crazy French lady” has done outdid herself by bringing me not one box of Yodels, but three boxes. We’re not talking the cheap knock offs here, either. We’re talking smooth chocolate cakes filled with creamed whatever brought to you by the good people of Hostess. Or possibly […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Smoke 'em if you got 'em
It’s hard to believe there was a time when smoking was considered cool. But oh, there were such times. Think James Dean leaning against that 1949 Mercury Coupe, a mile of street cred dangling from his lips. Think Clint Eastwood in “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly,” scowling around that hand-rolled smoke so blazingly, […]
Posted inbPlus
Organized chaos: AMS lunch ladies serve it up
For a few unsettling moments, I was afraid the girl with the wide brown eyes was going to start a revolt. She was halfway through the lunch line when she stopped abruptly. Her eyes went big and she gripped her tray so tight, it shook. I braced for a mutiny — a “Lord of the […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Thou shalt not exercise unauthorized control
I think it’s only fair to warn you: I am in possession of a shod foot and I’m not afraid to use it. Forgive my surliness. I’ve been reading through the latest list of criminal indictments, where court folks take exciting local crimes and twist them into confusing, dull and overly long paragraphs of legalese. […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Christmas gift ideas that probably won’t get you kicked out of the family
If I look deep within myself with unalloyed honesty, I’m not sure I ever completely forgave my brother for giving me an ice scraper for Christmas. Don’t get me wrong: As ice scrapers go, it was just fine. It had the little teeth on the edge to rip into ice and there was a nice […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: It’s a mad, mad, mad, mad world
A tip for you smart shoppers: All I want for Christmas this year is a one-way ticket out of Looneyville — a fast flight out of this goofy dystopian landscape that feels like equal parts George Orwell, Philip K. Dick and Dr. Seuss. You know what I’m talking about. Somehow we all woke up in […]