Big money The Powerball jackpot got up over a billion dollars before some jerks across the country won it. A BILLION dang dollars, as in a 1 followed by nine zeroes. Unless you happen to be a major corporation or a small country whose name nobody can pronounce, you probably have no real grasp of […]
Mark LaFlamme
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Street names for all!
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. My favorite street name, back when I worked in that world, was “Boo.” It’s short, it’s easy to remember, and if you say it just right during the commission of a street crime, it can cause comical fright among your fellow hooligans. Great fun. When your […]
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Talk of the town: He who smelt it dealt it
Look away, I’m hideous A schoolteacher formerly known as Mrs. Morton called with the suspicion that I was her student in third grade back in 1964. She came to this conclusion after seeing my photo that accompanies my newspaper column, which to me is very distressing. Since I wasn’t born until 1967, the idea that […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Remembering the good times when you people knew nothing
People used to look me up all the time to get what I had. It didn’t matter the hour of day or time of year. Christmas Eve just before midnight? Ring, ring, ring. “Bunch of cops just went flying by my house,” my late-night caller would say. “What are you hearing?” So, I’d click on […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the town: The Mad Trapper of Rat River and other tales
Start me up It’s ironic that after years of getting ridiculed for riding my motorcycle in sloppy winter weather, this year it seems like everyone is out on a bike while mine sits in the garage. I have a starter problem, and just you shut up about it. Happens to all guys after they start […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: The art of checking out
The mission is important and I take it very seriously. In my hands I’m clutching three cans of cat food, a carton of half ‘n half, a bag of chopped walnuts and a jar of peanut butter. If I’m not in my car and headed for home in three minutes or less, I’ll consider this […]
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Talk of the town: If you don’t stop picking it, it will never heal
Touché That’s how I pronounce “Tourtière,” the traditional Christmas dish which the people of Lewiston, for some reason, refer to only as “meat pie.” Not very imaginative, people of Lewiston. Not to mention that it’s great fun to say “Tourtière.” Your tongue slams against your teeth in all kinds of exciting ways and, if you […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: How to shop for a new girlfriend without getting crushed by a Yule log
Shopping for your new girlfriend? Sweet. Here’s a piece of advice for you: that thing you have in your hand right now? Put it down. Put it down and walk away or it’s going to become a big, old thing and your Christmas morning will be filled with screaming and acrimony, instead of Johnny Mathis […]
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Talk of the town: We gonna do this thing, or what?
Home invasion! Earlier in the week, a local woman called 911 to report either a turkey or a rooster trying to get into her house. An emergency dispatcher sent over either a cop or a fireman to deal with the situation. The bird was either removed from the home or left there. Either nobody was […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the town: You might want to have yourself checked
I call this one ‘Puddle in Shadow’ So, last week while covering an event at Lewiston’s Ramada Inn, I kept stepping directly into a deep, cold puddle that waited in darkness like a trap outside the main doors. It happened not once, not twice, but thrice, to the point where I had to make up […]