If I look deep within myself with unalloyed honesty, I’m not sure I ever completely forgave my brother for giving me an ice scraper for Christmas. Don’t get me wrong: As ice scrapers go, it was just fine. It had the little teeth on the edge to rip into ice and there was a nice […]
Mark LaFlamme
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the town: Some weather we’re having
It wasn’t me, it was some other guy The Sun Journal now has a drone, and with that acquisition, so ends my ability to sneak onto the newspaper roof in order to take naps, drink cocoa and do other things that I’m not free to discuss. If the paper doesn’t have a basement of some […]
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Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: It’s a mad, mad, mad, mad world
A tip for you smart shoppers: All I want for Christmas this year is a one-way ticket out of Looneyville — a fast flight out of this goofy dystopian landscape that feels like equal parts George Orwell, Philip K. Dick and Dr. Seuss. You know what I’m talking about. Somehow we all woke up in […]
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Talk of the town: I’ve got your nose!
Light snow, freezing fog This was a description of the day’s weather in the NOAA forecast that greeted me first thing Monday. Seriously, is this a real thing? I’m still getting used to the polar vortex and now we have freezing fog? It sounds like a weather condition that might exist on one of the […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Three questions for Christmas
It’s a miracle. A Christmas miracle. Just when I thought I was to come up empty in a search for this week’s column, an epic rant lands in my newsroom telephone mailbox. In this message, a fellow named Daniel poses three questions on the nature of the holidays — questions that I am to research […]
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Talk of the town: I got nothing
Black Friday I’ll bet you that if the dollar store announced Black Friday savings, people would line up outside just like they do at the high-falutin’ stores such as Kmart. I think they should do it just so that the rest of us can witness the marvel of people throwing hands and sweeping legs over […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: On victims and villains
Somewhere out there in the November gloom is a 54-year-old woman about whom most people have forgotten. A few weeks ago, it was a different story. A few weeks ago, she was public enemy No. 1, a woman deemed reckless, negligent and irresponsible by people who used multiple exclamation points to declare her so. A […]
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Talk of the town: Things I see when I’m driving around
Greetings from the other side There’s a sign in front of a business at Lisbon and Pleasant in Lewiston that I’m pretty sure is a link to the afterworld. The sign says “6 cents,” which is clearly a reference to Cole Sear and others who possess a paranormal ability to speak with the dead. In […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Surviving car safety with clean underwear
There’s been another shooting downtown and I’m on the prowl. I’m using the wife’s car for some reason, but it should be all right. Getting there is half the battle. The easy half, as it turns out. All I wanted to do was quietly park, surreptitiously surveil the area and unobtrusively roam the scene of […]
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Mark LaFlamme: You make me feel like dancing
Let it bleed Well, it finally happened. I made myself bleed by playing the piano. I think we all knew that I would eventually find a way to suffer a piano-related injury. The problem is this: I chew my fingers in full wolf-biter fashion, so when my very excellent piano teacher asked me to attempt […]