Lord of the ring. The crispy, delicious ring. You know what’s good? Humpty Dumpty Sour Cream & Onion Rings. They’re like Funyuns! Only, they’re not Funyuns! It’s just madness! Delicious, crunchy madness! Grub-a-dub So a nice lady called me up earlier in the week and reported that grubs were destroying her lawn. “I’ve got grubs,” […]
talk of the town
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme, News
Mark LaFlamme: Fiddleheads and scorpions, oh my!
‘Could L-A be future home to a scorpion farm?’ That’s a real headline from Wednesday’s paper. What, are you people drunk? It’s like you’ve never seen a B horror movie starring William Shatner and Roddy McDowall. Put your little scorpion farm next to the wrong mill or toxic waste dump and BAM! Next thing you […]
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Posted inbPlus, Mark LaFlamme
Mark LaFlamme: You and what army?
Flush with pride Had quite the good time over the weekend cruising around and examining the various mounds of trash put out for Auburn’s spring cleanup, or whatever they’re calling it now. You can tell a lot about a society by the things they throw out, you know. This year, I saw toilets. Lots of […]
Posted inbPlus, Lewiston-Auburn
Mark LaFlamme: Quit staring at my head
Ocean’s 19 Nobody will ever do a big action movie about the kind of bank robbers we get here in Lewiston. Seriously, when is the last time a stickup man WASN’T captured within 15 minutes or so? I always wonder how those conversations go in prison: “I got six blocks away before they got me. […]
Posted inbPlus
Mark LaFlamme: Remember to phrase your complaints in the form of questions!
Swindled! I was cruising around the city the other day and couldn’t help but notice that Dirigo Federal Credit Union on Main Street is gone. My money! You cads! Lure me in with promises of generous interest rates for my big Sun Journal bucks and then flee in the middle of the night with my […]
Posted inbPlus, Mark LaFlamme
Mark LaFlamme: A Song of Slush and Mud
All’s well that ends well 9:15 p.m. Wednesday night, a woman reported she had received a notice from Publishers Clearing House that she’d hit the jackpot and she suspected it might be a scam. Police went over and looked into it. The Publishers Clearing House thing was bogus, but it turns out the woman was […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Mark LaFlamme: Boy, that’s going to smart in the morning
So, now what? So, I’ve been on vacation for a week and once again, I’ve completely forgotten how to write Talk of the Town. Is this a space for quiet reflection and somber discussions about the important matters of the day? Am I supposed to write sonnets in here so that we may explore the […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Mark LaFlamme: We had joy, we had fun
Heads up You know what’s cool about the self checkout lines at Hannaford? They have cameras pointing down from the ceiling so finally you get to see what the top of your head looks like. I mean, haven’t you always wondered? My God I have a handsome scalp! Well, dog gone Saw a man walking […]
Posted inbPlus, Lewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Mark LaFlamme: Would you like a car wash today?
Don’t blink during wintertime in Lewiston What’s this? You say 41 vehicles were towed for on-street parking in Lewiston after a recent three-incher of a snowstorm? You say nearly four dozen people didn’t know better in spite of that fancy flashing lights system they installed in the City Hall tower? Clearly what we need next […]
Posted inbPlus, Mark LaFlamme
Mark LaFlamme: I don’t see how that’s any of your business
This, that and the other thing